Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Trivia time!
(I know, I disappear for a substantial amount of time and come back with stupid openings)

Did you know...

that our very own country, yes Malaysia (Islamic with all the taboos stamped into the concrete floors that pave the country), has its very own porn blog site?

Ok, I'm probably way in the prehistorics (i.e. it is possible the Chinese Malaysian community has launched its fair share of eye-gouging naughtiness) but being directed this Malay porn blog was a slap to the forehead with the additional head shake and omg-the-shame sigh.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for porn, kink and everything that's naughty.

However, my internet squealed and came to a grinding halt in protest trying to load the first page of this blog. Plus, I think I lost my lunch after seeing picture #2.

Seriously, it's one thing to be cheekily promiscuous, completely another to be horribly ugly with bad camera angles. The way I see it, people who look at porn see it as a source to rub one out (eventually) and/or an appetizer to hot and heavy sex. There are probably many other reasons (feel free to email me with your own! ;)) but the main thing here is the arousal.

Seeing that Malay girl suck the tip of that man's cock made me feel immoral and dirty. In short: borderline sensation between running to the nearest bathroom to puke and moving out of the country.

Which is quite disturbing.

Nobody would ever want to be "pornstars".

I was told that there were actually sexier posts... but I declined as I was not about to spend my time wading through ten pages of tiny cocks and horrible bodies to find one decent picture. It's the sad shallow truth: if you're going to make your porn live on the internet, please don't launch your career if you don't even have a decent face, set of breasts and/or a nice ass your audience can look at.

Again, it might be a fetish . But for fuck's sake.

If you're wondering, no I am not going to publish the link here. Even if I'm going to peddle porn, it's got to be of decent quality. This terrible archive fails. Badly.

If you're curious enough to the point that it will simply kill you if you didn't get to see the site, feel free to shoot me an email or beep me on MSN.

Excuse me, I need to go scrub my eyes with soap now.

Labels: ,

posted at 8/29/2006 05:19:00 PM by nekomatta · 0 comments


Thursday, August 17, 2006

I love Malaysia, but I hate a minute fraction of the people in the service industry who have absolutely no sense of customer service.

To start things off: my dad's site domain expired, email server went crashing down, dad saw red and I took the flak. It's all good.

So in I go diving through emails, looking for the domain reseller and a little surprised that I didn't get a prior warning that the site domain was about to expire. From the previous host's long, lengthy email of information, I got hold of the reseller and hastily emailed them in hopes that the problem would be fixed as soon as possible if not immediately.

I get a speedy reply that says, "Our records show that we have (insert previous hosting company, abbreviated: PHC)'s PersonA on file. Kindly contact PersonA from PHC to renew this domain."

What the fuck.

See, PHC had said everything was transferred over but apparently, they had only transferred the hosting and completely forgot about the domain name; basically who the reseller had on file.

Me being me, I sent an angry email to the reseller asking if it's possible to migrate ownership because I have no intentions of dealing with PHC ever again so long as I am capable of breathing. Reseller says I have to inform PHC. WELL. Technically, everything should've been transferred. I email a nasty (as nasty as text carries tone) letter to PHC, with a carbon copy to the reseller stating that I no longer want to deal with them and it would be fantastic if PHC would forward all invoicing materials to the reseller so everything is actually under my dad's company's name AS AGREED BEFORE.
I know, if only on-screen text could fly and stab you right in the eyes. If only.

To my astonishment, this little prick of a rep from PHC had the cheek to write me back saying, "Please pay attention that the billing and administrative information has now been changed your own details. This means all emails and billing reminders for your domain will be sent to you so you can renew the domain by your own." Of course, this message was originally written in broken grammar and I just needed to tidy up because not every person understands Malaysian English.

Number one. Don't be an asshat. I have the same information and even though the administrative contact is to the company, the BILLING/Invoicing is still to the reseller. And we all know, from the third paragraph that the reseller has PHC on record. Therefore, I don't get the privy of getting any golden reminders that the domain is about to croak.

Number two. Don't be sarcastic with me when you know somewhere along the way, you messed up too. I can be an equally sarcastic bitch.

Number three. I do not like that man, nor do I like PHC. Why? Because, while revamping dad's site, I looked through their PHP (that sends participant registration details to the company's email) wanting to add new fields but instead, found that PHC included their OWN EMAIL alongside the company's.

To the people at PHC: was there some fine print that said you could collect your client's client's information while you had initially built that poor excuse for a website (which has now been retired, thank the heavens)? And... isn't that illegal? Shady too. And completely non-ethical. Shame on you!

PHC, rot in hell for giving the industry a bad name.

And I'd recommend sending your employees for training to comprehend what it means to be curteous and ethical.

Labels: , ,

posted at 8/17/2006 05:20:00 AM by nekomatta · 0 comments

sex you up, pre-school style

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Yes, my title is a little pedo but hear me out.

It's a typical Saturday and we head out for a great night of resplendent jazz, throaty vocals and otherworldly percussions at Mont Kiara. Past the first session, there's an intermission gap where the host comes on stage to crack a few jokes, juggle an obscene amount of balls and make us laugh to kill time before the second session starts.

Well, if only.

This intermission was a participatory one. Before any of you even as so much think I'd ever volunteer myself, think again. One of the games were one of those dance-for-prize games. Although, no one knew about the dance part so as a majority, a bunch of kids volunteered themselves and got ushered up onto stage.

The prize: some holiday getaway; not too shabby three days two nights isolation for making an ass out of yourself on-stage for ten seconds.

The task: dancing to Madonna's "Sorry" -_-

Considering most of them haven't even reached puberty yet, I was expecting a fanciful, cutesy dance routine ala Kidsong from the contestants. There were three "adult" contestants but the poor man barely moved an inch while the music played, except to turn in drunken circles at where he stood while the other two ladies gave a stiff and lukewarm Shakira/Ciara-esque performance.
If you frequent clubs enough, you'll know how that goes.

So first kid contestant, young twelve year old Indian girl who was actually pretty active (i.e. not turn in circles on her feet) but looked more like she was working out to a Jane Fonda video. I was impressed at her for being so sporting and I'm thinking to myself she's got the balls to go up there and flail her arms for a second or two.

Audience claps. I cheer.

In comes eleven (yes, ELEVEN) year old girl contestant two. The host asks if she can dance and she replies with a shy "not really" while holding a hand to her mouth. I am expecting more Jane Fonda routines and settle back in my wobbly plastic chair while I waited to cheer this brave, young girl on.

The music plays...

and lo and behold, this ELEVEN year old girl starts shaking her booty (and I mean shake... so much so there was a camera pan-and-zoom), dipping her hips, doing the shoulder lean and sending the crowd into a frenzy while I imagine, giving the pedobears abrupt explosive nose bleeds while they die and fly off to kiddie porn heaven/hell.

I mean, what the hell. Sexy, slutty dance moves have now reached new heights and touched the souls of eleven year old girls bringing out their inner sense of womanly empowerment--as a future cocktease.

It's not only the girls. For example, the adorable eleven year old Japanese boy who smiles ever so shyly and responds a "not as good as her" when asked if he can dance. Music plays and our boy is breaking out The Robot and getting busy with his Justin Timberlake moves.

I am halfway between pretty impressed and slightly mortified at the things you can learn by watching MTV (or Channel V).

I can only imagine what the girl's mom was thinking as she watched her daughter do the Beyonce/Britney on stage... "OHMYGOD MY BABY GIRL" followed by a graceful collapse.

Also, I can't help but wonder if the MTV channel is on parental lock until graduation starting tonight ;)


posted at 8/13/2006 02:02:00 AM by nekomatta · 0 comments

the sound of noise

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

I think I might be going crazy.

For starters, my hearing has been off the sensitivity charts. At one point in time, I thought I was going deaf... now, every damn thing is too loud and it annoys the bleeding life out of me. Especially the television. It's so loud I can hardly hear myself think and the noise (hello CNN and the daily bombings) displaces any sense of normalness.

Turn it off you say?

My dad is watching it; catching up with the latest political gossip and seemingly permanent war zone in the middle east. Congratulations to power, ego and modern technology which will be the inevitable, self-inflicted masochistic apocalyptic cause of the end of the world.

With every building/town that gets blown into bits, I'm sure there's a contractor out there who orgasms thinking about the money his company will make bidding for reconstruction projects.

But I digress. Either my dad is turning deaf, or my ear drums are about to vibrate and disappear into oblivion.

That is why, night time is mysteriously splendid. Splendid in every form of sense... even though I can hear the creaky sound of my neighbor's room doors opening and closing.

And here I thought, the walls of my apartment in Madison were paper thin. Obviously the developers of this house used hollow bricks and nano thin cement layers as walls. Don't get me started on the paint that's actually really just half powder.

On a side note, the "h" key on my lappie is buggered. It just falls off even though I've repositioned it into the grooves. Strange, but I half expected my w, a, s and d keys to be the first few to kick the bucket from all the WoW abuse it has received.


posted at 8/08/2006 10:50:00 PM by nekomatta · 0 comments

google me sex

Sunday, August 06, 2006

So much for Ad"Sense". Today's ad: Church Shoes at Herring's.

Right O.o

And for the longest time, it was an ad for some Japanese soba recipe.

One of the terms for AdSense is that your site should not have any pornography on it. Which, if you think about it, is rather silly economically speaking. Does this mean porn sites can't use AdSense to promote their sites (unless there's a special clause or fine print I missed out some place)?

It would be strange if you had a smut blog and the ads you're getting off your keywords aren't the least bit sexy at all and kills any inkling of a budding arousal. At most, you'd want to slap your head against the nearest hard surface at the complete lack of relevance.

But then again, sex really sells itself.


posted at 8/06/2006 09:33:00 PM by nekomatta · 0 comments

tell me what you don't like about yourself

Thursday, August 03, 2006

The good: Astro's showing Nip/tuck. Hello Dr. Christian-hottie-Troy and sex pot Kimber.

The bad: Astro is three seasons late. This just means that I might have to look for other ways to get my paws on season four as the episodes air without having Mo blow the whole episode (or season) away for me.

The extremely ugly: Nip/tuck meet Malaysia. Nip/tuck meet censorship more harsh than a blunt, rusty rod up the out hole.


posted at 8/03/2006 01:34:00 AM by nekomatta · 0 comments
[ soon-to-be useful ]

nekomatta is...

This is Sean when she's emo. Sean Sean Tan;

sarcastic wordsmith, dirty in oh-so-many ways, fun-loving IE-hating CSS worshiping markup "engineer", anime-styled arm flailing expressive communicator, proudly self-initiated member of the cult of milk and caffeine, snotty pink crayon lover, tree hugging hippy organic designer, pole dancer wannabe, swing-a-ling lindy hopper, rabid arcane mage/bitchin' disc priest/annoying resto druid--sometimes spazzy, often giggly, always loud.
20% sugar, 80% kink.