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How much do we really hate ourselves?

The “Historical Romance” genre is pretty much… 90,000 words of misogyny.

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Almost there

So… my sister just casually mentioned there’s an outbreak of Japanese Encephalitis over in Victoria.

That’s plague, war, and pestilence.

Guess famine’s coming real soon with the wheat shortage.

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The Asian Way

My mother just shamed my cloud latte “art” (by art I mean it’s really just a blob of foam sitting in the middle of my cup).

She pointed to an article in the paper and said, “Look. Aunty in old kopitiam* also can make star shape.”

The shame is real.


*literally translates to “coffee shop”

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Online security training

Cybersecurity expert on phishing: “Did you receive the email at an unusual time? If you receive an email outside of normal business hours, this is a red flag.”

Guess everyone in ad agencies are potential scammers.

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First a pandemic, and now war

I’m not religious at all but at this point in time I can’t help but wonder if we’re just sitting around waiting for the other two horsemen to show up.


Sibling cysts

Me: Okay like my sore throat is lingering
Me: But I tested again today
Me: I r still negative
Me: Maybe my bitch ass of a cyst just takes awhile to resolve and I’m like OMGITSCOVID
Sis: Is this cyst in your throat or something?
Me: By the base of my throat, it’s like… a sensitivity check
Me: So the minute my lymph nodes are a little puffy, the cyst fomos
Me: “Hey guys where the party at??”
Me: 😑
Sis: The cystie boys be jigglin 😂😂😂
Sis: I’ve got a small cyst in my throat – called a vallecular cyst or something
Sis: It’s not genetic is it? 😂😂😂
Me: Oh mine’s a thyroglossal cyst
Sis: Same same but different
Sis: Like delta and omnicron 😂

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Literally once in a lifetime

Me: Oh oh bear guess what day it is today
Me: Get it???
Me: Because 2/22/22 😀 and Tuesday 😀
Bear: 🤦

My funny has gone unappreciated.

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This quarantine life

Because of COVID, every other brush with it lands you in isolation/quarantine (traveling back home, close contact, etc). I’ve barely been in the country for a month and I’ve already been in isolation/quarantine for half that time.

I should’ve stayed out of the country.

On the bright side, I’ve gotten really good at swabbing my nose and throat for the test kits. It’s like a deranged science experiment of sorts.

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That time of the year again

You know how parents love to talk about how successful their children are when Chinese New Year rolls around?

Well my parents associate these three keywords with me in every story they tell: weed, yoga, and crypto.

I’m basically a hipster/druggie degenerate gambler to everyone they know.

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Apes strong together

Watching the WSB community rally over GME has got to be the most epic thing to happen in 2021 (so far!). It’s truly amazing: they went from buying billboards to adopting animals en masse.

Won’t even lie, the animal adoptions and legendary memes are probably the coolest things the degenerate crayon eaters have come up with.