nekomattaI don’t remember any of my past site launches being so chaotic.
But yesterday’s site launch has given me an important/amusing insight: everyone, and I mean EVERYONE COLLECTIVELY, is afraid of the IT guy.
Mental note to have a scary Russian chap man the servers in the future.
2021 edit–
Putin people in their places, eyyy.
2022 edit–
That Putin pun did not age well at all.
If you’re interested at all in intermittent fasting, let me just be the first to point out one of its more honest, less publicized, and not-so-stellar side effects: EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA.
Get ready to hold onto your toilet seat and ride that upward fluid acceleration.
You’ve been warned.
2021 edit–
I don’t know why I like experimenting on myself. 2018 was also the year I tried keto.
It’s the third day of the dreaded 14/10 fasting schedule (read: starve for 14 hours, and try not to eat like ravenous slob in the next 10 hours). Things (so far) I can’t believe I’ve survived while being at the tail end of my fasted state:
– 2 hour yoga class
– Answering (coherent) questions about Salesforce/Marketo
The one thing I don’t foresee myself surviving this week: PT.
2021 edit–
Oooh, progress! I can comfortably shift in and out of this routine without being (too) hangry these days. Hell yas!
All three male PTs at the EMS gym obsessed over my calves today–I’ve never had so many men gush over how manly my calves are. It’s the oddest sensation ever. They even made me stand on tiptoes. My calves are the envy of all men who workout and loathe leg day.
I guess that’s a great thing. Nobody goes to the gym to be called pretty. I’m here to be fit, damnit!
2021 edit–
Trivia: EMS is just a fancy acronym for electrocution. Sounds insane, but the best thing I got out of that experience was to know which muscles to engage while performing a particular exercise. Also, my calves have not stopped being enviable.
I wrinkled my nose at him, “This lady is super impressive. She’s got thirteen units that she’s renting on out AirBnB! Talk about being enterprising!”
He blinked. “Shit. We’ve wasted our lives. We must do something about it this year. Like making a baby.”
I stared. “Wait, what?”
“You said we’d be making our own product this year,” he replied nonchalantly.
“That’s not exactly the product I had in mind…”
2021 edit–
On today’s episode of #truenerd! I chuckled at how clever it was.
Friday the 13th is really living up to its name–my thyroglossal cyst invited the throat infection in to party and let’s just say things got a little explosive. I’m now up to my eyeballs in antibiotics.
The doctor also gave me a sedative of sorts, which makes doing anything borderline impossible. Ah, sweet delicious sleep. It’s almost as if I’m trading throat soreness with eventual bed sores.
2021 edit–
Dude, I got sick again?? WTF. COME ON. It’s only been a week! Pretty sure 2017 was the height of my dedication to being fit and all that jazz.
The most amazing thing in the world right now: having someone I know accidentally stumble upon the article over at Little Slices about freelancing and telling me things like, “Oh my God! That article sounds like it really came from you!!! I totally read it in your voice haha!”
Totally feeling the love! Makes up for all the raging suck I got thrown into yesterday.
2021 edit–
I had loads of fun with that back when… I was traveling. And meeting people. OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT EVEN LIKE ANYMORE.
It’s only nine days into the new year and I’ve already blown my quota at mentally cursing out project managers who are half baked and have absolutely no fucking clue at what they’re doing and/or asking for. I cannot emphasize no fucking clue enough. HOW DID THESE PEOPLE EVEN GET JOBS?? Again, a project manager should be able to do more than just reply emails and draft up briefs in PowerPoint.
Having to deal with abhorrent crazies early in the morning makes me unnecessarily violent and sends me into fits of uncontrollable coughing.
I might be jumping the gun here, but as a PSA to everyone working with a front end developer for anything, CSS is not the same thing as PSD. For fuck’s sake. If you’re working in a digital agency, you REALLY SHOULD KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.
So much for complaining less and embracing the world’s positivity. I will do better tomorrow.
2021 edit–
Well, the zen in my flow aged poorly.
I previously entertained the idea of creating themes/templates and naming them after people I know and respect. It was to be an inspired piece of sorts, and as a way to say, “Hey, thanks for being part of my life and I appreciate you!”
As it turns out, the longer you dawdle, the sinking realization of how much everyone has changed (some for the utter worse) starts to set in. Kinda like what it feels like to see the cement harden around your ankles right before you’re tossed of a bridge into a river of unknown depths below.
I’ve now come to loathe 80% of the people I used admire.
I guess the lesson here is to just make it anyway, in hopes that whatever you made preserved the very best and brightest bits of your relationship with said person.
2021 edit–
I feel like this is very applicable to baby names as well. I am thankful all I’m naming is a cat or two. Maybe three.
All my plans were disrupted because my body started producing the most foul-smelling, wretched-tasting, nasty-looking phlegm in fashionable shades of regurgitated seaweed green and trampled pollen yellow. Talk about getting the seasonal rejects.
The running joke is that I fell sick after attending a wake because my chi wasn’t strong enough. The other theory is that I absorbed too much death and my body is still learning how to wield its power.
Or it could really just be because someone wouldn’t stay home to recover while he was ill!
2021 edit–
On the bright side, at least it wasn’t COVID. Too soon?