Today I learned IKEA sells mandarin oranges (no assembly required!).
Talk about designer oranges.
2021 edit–
I’d literally kill to be able to walk around in IKEA again. And bringing home that random piece of kitchenware.
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Day 33: Global warming
The weather is all sorts of fucked up. I can’t be elegant about its turbulence because it’s causing my immune system to go COMPLETELY HAYWIRE.
Is simply eating healthy, sleeping enough, and getting regular exercise just not good enough these days?
2021 edit–
Given that I’ve not fallen sick at all in the past year while a pandemic was (and still is) raging on, I was clearly doing something wrong back then.
Where did January go?
How am I still stuck trying to work on a site that’s so poorly built?
Why is my crpyto portfolio still sideways?
Why does my water percentage keep dropping each time I see my PT? How much water do I realistically need to drink to have an okay reading? AND DON’T EVEN SUGGEST CUTTING SALT.
I probably have to reduce my salt intake, sigh.
2021 edit–
2021 AND STILL SALTY AFFFFF. Also laughing at in 2021: concept of “time”.
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Day 29: Writing for myself
This blog is a lesson in discipline–one that I’m slowly failing.
And to think writing used to come so naturally. I’m not sure what happened. Self-censorship? Fear of failure? What failure? Bad grammar?
I had an English teacher who used to say my stories sucked, because she wasn’t quite happy with the endings I wrote.
“It could’ve been a better one,” she’d used to say.
If you think about it, does that mean I was doing a good job all the way up until the very end of my story? Like she was invested enough in the entire story to frown upon the ending she thought had not done my characters justice?
Or was it really something along the lines of, “Goddamnit you motherfucker, GIVE ME BACK 30 MINUTES OF MY LIFE.”
I mean, we’ve all been there. Ending of Starcraft 2 (I felt SO cheated). Ending of Mirror of the Witch (I still can’t believe I subscribed to Netflix just to finish the last five episodes, for shame). I could go on, but that’s not exactly the point.
What if I’m just unable to deliver closure? Does that mean I’ll be sitting on piles of unfinished garbage until the day I die?
But they’re my stories. Shouldn’t I get to decide how they end? How affected should I be by choruses of dislike? Does it count as constructive criticism? Or just really a difference in opinion? I mean… I WILL KILL THEM OFF BY WAY OF DROWNING IN MARSHMALLOWS IF I SEE FIT.
2021 edit–
I’m a freaking nutbar.
Especially the ones who talk so much smack but have nothing to back their shit up with when everything starts falling apart.
Trash.
2021 edit–
I still love telling this story about the shady techbros (words like shocking and appalling come to mind).
Something you’d have to hear in-person purely for the hand gestures and facial expressions.
After the week I’ve had, I just want to roll around and do absolutely nothing.
That literally translates to, “I’m going to roll around and compulsively check Delta and cry over all the potential mooning coins I don’t have fiat to buy.”
Such is life.
2021 edit–
The beginning of my crypto affliction.
I don’t remember any of my past site launches being so chaotic.
But yesterday’s site launch has given me an important/amusing insight: everyone, and I mean EVERYONE COLLECTIVELY, is afraid of the IT guy.
Mental note to have a scary Russian chap man the servers in the future.
2021 edit–
Putin people in their places, eyyy.
2022 edit–
That Putin pun did not age well at all.
If you’re interested at all in intermittent fasting, let me just be the first to point out one of its more honest, less publicized, and not-so-stellar side effects: EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA.
Get ready to hold onto your toilet seat and ride that upward fluid acceleration.
You’ve been warned.
2021 edit–
I don’t know why I like experimenting on myself. 2018 was also the year I tried keto.
It’s the third day of the dreaded 14/10 fasting schedule (read: starve for 14 hours, and try not to eat like ravenous slob in the next 10 hours). Things (so far) I can’t believe I’ve survived while being at the tail end of my fasted state:
– 2 hour yoga class
– Answering (coherent) questions about Salesforce/Marketo
The one thing I don’t foresee myself surviving this week: PT.
2021 edit–
Oooh, progress! I can comfortably shift in and out of this routine without being (too) hangry these days. Hell yas!
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Day 016
All three male PTs at the EMS gym obsessed over my calves today–I’ve never had so many men gush over how manly my calves are. It’s the oddest sensation ever. They even made me stand on tiptoes. My calves are the envy of all men who workout and loathe leg day.
I guess that’s a great thing. Nobody goes to the gym to be called pretty. I’m here to be fit, damnit!
2021 edit–
Trivia: EMS is just a fancy acronym for electrocution. Sounds insane, but the best thing I got out of that experience was to know which muscles to engage while performing a particular exercise. Also, my calves have not stopped being enviable.